Thursday, November 28, 2013

Things got worse - how could they have????!!!!!!!!!!

I never mentioned that we bought a dog. I've had labrador's my entire life til I married hubby. Turns out hubby likes doggies as well. So we finally decided that we would buy one.

When we were on vacation for our anniversary we were looking and had settled on one litter. So when we got back we contacted the family and made arrangements to go and buy one. When we got there there were 3 white labs and 3 black ones. Hubby and I knew that we wanted a girl, one that we'd hope would be calm and gentle. Turned out all the black ones were boys and all the white ones were girls.

Hubby let me ultimately pick one. There was one little puppy who crawled up into my lap and cuddled into me. Seemed a bit calmer than the rest. It was instant love. And we haven't looked back since.

Being that we are Muslim, the Quran says that we shouldn't own dogs because they are "unclean" (there's reasons but I don't want to get into that though) and so when we touch them we have to clean our hands and if the doggie licks us then that part of us becomes unclean. And even more important is that dogs cannot come into the house because when they do then the angels leave. Angels are UBER important so dogs are banned to the outdoors.

Now hubby and I spent LOTS of money to buy a nice big and spacious doggy house and made sure that we hung out with her regularly - changed her water every 6ish hours and fed her two-three times per day (didn't want to make her fat). Unfortunately the way our yard is - it backs onto the main road and for some STUPID reason the city considers it our FRONT yard and so we aren't allowed to build a wood fence. Well we did thinking that the city would just ignore it (there's other ppl on the street that have this) and we have stupid neighbors who finked on us and we were told to tear it down or face a massive fine. The shitty result of this is that every tom, dick and harry who passed by would see our beloved dog outside (because for whatever reason she would rather hang out under the stars (she would even drag our her blankets and bedding to be out under the stars) - well this did NOT sit well with people and they would stop us to enquire why our dog was outside all the time - why wouldn't we take her inside - a whack of bullshit that we dealt with patiently. Heck we even had someone put a "note" on our door to tell us that they would BUY or TAKE our dog if we couldn't care for her properly.

Fast forward to Tues and I got little tyke ready for school and when I got back to the house I fed the doggy. Then hubby decided he was ready to wake up and up to the couch he went. Well at about 11:00 am he looked into the yard and couldn't see the doggy. He went outside to find that she wasn't there and that "SOMEONE" had taken our dog. yes - STOLEN OUR FUCKING DOG!!!!!!!!!

She's ALWAYS on a lead (she's a bit of a houddini) and we had this ledge about thigh high that we had barricaded and she "couldn't" get to it. Our back yard is fully fenced and the gate is locked (and still was) with a word lock.

What we "think" happened is that some person got into the yard and went to the barricaded area and took down the barricade and somehow coaxed our doggy to that area - untied her lead and took her.

I just want my doggy back!

Saturday, November 23, 2013

Life just keeps getting crappier - WTH???!!!

Still haven't heard back from work about WHEN I get to actually go back.

Then today got his pink slip and told that the company he works for "doesn't have enough work" and since there's no union, they just get to choose who they "let go". Hubby has the most seniority in his department so it's frustrating to say the least.

Then when we go out for a bite to eat (to try to make ourselves feel a bit better over such CRAPPY news) we get a call from home from hubby's mom telling us that she is laid off as well.

HOLY CRAP man!!!!!!!!!!!!

So now that's THREE incomes NOT coming into the house. I'm wondering whether the "recession" is hitting us or whether it's just dumb luck. Either way it stinks and It's hard not to be frustrated, and depressed.

Trying to figure out whether I should laugh or cry

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Modified duties to return to work

So I gave my oc-health paperwork that I filled out and my physician signed off of to the hospital. Turns out they're suspicious of it. UGH, it never ends. Some other physician has to check out the paperwork and determine if my physician has to write a more "official" letter to explain why I need restricted shifts. In the paperwork it's indicated that I can work fri, sat, sun - evenings or nights. They don't understand why this is important - even after I explained to them that I would be taking narcotics mon-thurs since I get my seton tightened on mondays - and I can't work when I have been taking narcotics. Pretty sure my patients wouldn't want me as their nurse who's flying high (not exactly true) plus there's the thing of malpractice. Ya wouldn't want something to happen when I'm on those puppies! Plus once I have my seton tightened I'm in crazy amounts of pain and it's difficult to sit or walk - heightens the pain for sure.

So ya, don't know what I'm going to do. All I want to do now that I'm feeling better is go back to work. Unemployments/short term disability is done and so I need some money rolling in!!! Plus I have to pay for next semester's tuitio in a matter of weeks. Kinda hard to do with no money!

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Insomnia's a bitch

UGH - I hate not being able to sleep. I wish I could be working (missed the cut off date to start by about 2 days thanks to hubby forgetting to bring my information to work to scan & email it for me) now I have to wait until next weekend to hopefully start working. At least if I was able to work, I might actually be getting paid for being awake. Right now I'm just frustrated!

I suppose I could have done some school work... there's certainly enough of it left remaining. The phys assessment DVD has been received by my teacher - sooooo happy for that one. There was a BIG BIG chance of it going MIA. Would NOT have been impressed if that happened. Though with my luck it wouldn't surprise me.

I've been reading blogs, and trying to find other blogs to read (medically related mostly) and it's not necessarily the easiest. I want to find blogs where the writers actually still write. A LOT of blogs that I've found have been where the writer has just stopped writing - no explanation provided. Poof just gone. Irritating to say the least. And even when you find blogs that make the list of ppl who talk about blogs - same thing, a lot of inactive writers. Anyone know of active bloggers?

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Finally I get the word

I've been told I can go back to work!!!!!!! FINALLY!!! It's been almost 5 months since all this health stuff started and I FINALLY feel ready enough to go back to work.

I met with my physician yesterday and got him to fill out the paperwork to tell my company that I can go back to work - although with restrictions. I can only work on the weekends. The reason for that is that every monday or other monday the surgeon will tighten the seton and considering it's quite painful and it's too difficult to do the walking and sitting that my job requires.

When I went to my physician and updated him (haven't seen him for almost 3 weeks - since before the new abcess) he was like "wow alot has happened". He was NOT psyched to hear I wasn't on antibiotics because everytime I'm not on one, something new happens - an infection in the fistula track, a new abcess - it's always something.

He also asked me when I last had a scope done - many years ago - but back then I had like 5 of them and they never found anything so I wouldn't expect them to find something now. Especially because I'm not having the GI issues I had back then. I'm not sure I would want to go for a needless scope that isn't going to find anything. Why put myself through that kind of pain for nothing?!

I also talked to him about seeing a immunologist to maybe start the process into finding out why my immune system sucks. He said that he doesn't want to do anything until I'm fully healed. He figures that no specialist woud want to touch me when I'm in the care of the surgeon and having medical needs going on at the moment. So we wait on the immunologist - though I'm not sure that that's a smart idea because I know that I'm going to wait in order to see this person - you ALWAYS end up waiting so why not wait while I'm healing?!

On the school front - tomorrow I have to do this physical assessment DVD - and while it sounds easy isn't.... somehow I have to find a tuning fork, otoscope and reflex hammer.... do YOU know any NURSE who has these things in their possession?!!! I certainly don't!!! My physician was able to lend me the reflex hammer but he only has wall mounted otoscopes so that's a no go. I don't knwo what I'm going to do!!! ERG Well the show does go on, I guess I'll have to improvise!

Thursday, November 7, 2013

My nursing lab

This is the program that we use in school for one of the courses that I have to "read" for pharmacology. I don't have a problem reading the information but I don't find that the information is being adequately tested. When doing the tests I don't always find that the answers are in the text. You almost need to infer. I don't think that that's appropriate. It really IS supposed to come from that text.

Seems like my grades go from really good (90's) to not so good (60's) on these damn tests. ERG!!!! Goddamn I hate medications! There's so bloody many of them to remember everything about them.

Guess I have to keep plugging away

Tuesday, November 5, 2013

Almost finished this term

4:30 am and I'm just contemplating going to sleep. Seems I do most of my work at night. I prefer it this way, no one in the house awake to bother me (interrupt or such) and so I believe I've finished one of my requirements for next week for one of my courses.

I have a couple of more weeks left in this term. Holy smokes has it gone quickly! I've done fabulously (so far) in the one course - mainly pharm with a bit of "other" stuff thrown in (kinda hard to articulate just what but it involves discussion boards). I've gotten excellent marks but the feedback kinda stinks. It doesn't really leave me with much to go on, good or bad. There's no critique, just marking. This is not something I'm used to, when I was in the BSN program previously, I got a LOT of feedback on my papers and assignments. It helped me get better with my writing and such but I'm just not getting it this time around. Is that a good sign or not I have NOOOOO idea. I hope it's a good one!

My other course has the clinical component and the theory part but they are separate entities. In order to pass the course you must pass both. But let me tell you, this teacher does NOT make it easy! So far I've been above the 75% critical point except for one but let me tell you, holy crap did I shit my pants when I didn't get that mark. There's only so many quizzes and such to bring your mark above 75% and when you don't hit that mark you really start to worry!

I wish I knew where I was in relation to the rest of the group. I always feel better when I know where I am in relation to others. Am I above, just at or below others? No idea in this instance. Causes me more worrying to be honest.

My ADHD is getting the better of me these days. Hubby has noticed it as well. I'm trying to be better at being motivated but I just feel sapped. I don't know if it's because of what's been going on with me health-wise or something else but I wish I could just nip it in the butt! I have a LOT of shit that needs to get done pronto and procrastinating is NOT helping matters!

Somehow I have to find an ottoscope and a tuning fork - any ideas?! It's not like I know of anyone who owns these things and has them in a drawer for handy moments. I suppose I will have to approach my physician to see if he'll let me borrow. Ya we'll see how well that goes! I need it in order to do assessment DVD worth a MAJOR portion of marks in my one course. WISH ME LUCK!

Monday, November 4, 2013

Boy did I enjoy myself

When I was pregnant I just KNEW that I was pregnant with a DD - and I was eccstatic. I've always dreamed of having one, being able to do her hair, dress her up and enjoy all the "girly" things that come along with having a daughter. Now while I got the daughter, I didn't necessarily get all the "daughter" to go along with the daughter. I got a little girl who LOVES to dress up and put on dresses but she LOVES short hair. Something that's frustrating to me. I want to be able to do braids and pony's and she just won't let me - ugh.

Halloween was fun this year though because she got so involved in the matter. We picked out her costume - a fairy. And she said the funniest thing... "I'm going to flap my wings and fly to every house so that I can get candy" - oh my goodness she has such an imagination! THIS is one of the main reasons why I want to be a nurse in a paeds ward - the things that come out of their mouths!

I'll leave you with a pic of the little tyke